KAIOSAMA
Home Planet: North Kaio-sei
Race: Kaio
Fusions: None
Appearances: Dragon Ball Z, Dragon Ball GT

The wise and experienced watcher of the Northern hemisphere of the Milky Way galaxy, Kaiosama, while never actually phyiscally participating in a single battle, provides almost priceless tips, advice, and leadership that, again and again, proves to be neccessary for our heroes' survival. He seems to have seen it all, but the true essence of what those eyes hidden behind those sunglasses have seen is beyond anyone's estimation.

Kaiosama is first introduced in the beginning of Dragon Ball Z, after Goku and Raditsu have been killed by Piccolo Makkankosappo (I DON'T CARE HOW THAT'S SPELLED, GAAAH). Goku, after hearing of the legendary Kaiosama from Kamisama, embarks on a journey across the seemingly neverending Serpent Path to find the wonderous teacher of martial arts on the other end. When Goku finally reaches the end of the path, he finds a silly monkey and an old, fat man. But looks can be deceiving, as this old, fat man soon proves.

Kaiosama's past is unclear and never really tapped upon. All we know is that he rules the Northern Galaxy...or, more or less watches over it, sort of like what Kamisama does with Earth. Since all the classes of ruling in this sense run along the same lines in the DBZ world, we can pretty much rest assured that Kaiosama rose to the throne of Northern Kaio after his precedent seceded.

Sporting powers of telepathy and a hidden inner strength we never really get to see the true extents of, Kaiosama is a teacher willing to take students only if they pass a set of tests before. The daunting vastness of the Serpent Path is the first of these tests. When he finally deems you worthy of receiving his knowledge, you begin his seemingly silly methods of training - such as chasing Bubbles, his pet monkey, or trying to hit Gregory, a flying smart-mouthed grasshopper, with a hammer. While many pupiils may find his exercises whacky and pointless (COUGH COUGH PICCOLO COUGH COUGH), no one, after going through them, can doubt the strength and experience gained afterwords.

Before Son Goku came along, the only person to ever actually see and receive training from Kaiosama was Lord Enma.

Lord Enma was the first, and, for thousands of years, the only pupil to ever be taken by Kaiosama.

After Goku finished his training from Kaiosama, wrapping it up by learning the Genki Dama, the powerful attack that uses the life force of organic creatures nearby to create a devastating ball of power (and Goku, having the only pure heart of the cast, was the only one fit to learn this technique), Kaiosama continued to watch from above, giving Goku advice for the fight against Vegeta. After the fight with Vegeta ends, Kaiosama continues to prove his usefullness. He gives the cast the location of Namek-sei, trains Teshinhan, Chaouzu, Yamucha, and even Piccolo, and warns them to steer clear of Freeza.

Kaiosama is always watching the heroes as they battle, sometimes with optimism and sometimes (like in the case of Freeza) with pessimism. But he isn't just a teacher figure, one who's kind of alienated from the cast. Funloving and most of the time carefree, its almost a given that he and Son Goku would become great friends, and their friendship, now that I think of it, is actually one of those great things that just all around kicks ass about DBZ. I don't know about you, but I love seeing Kaiosama and Goku interact with each other.

Even when Goku surpasses him in strength, he continues to keep turning to Kaiosama for training and advice. Even near the end of the series, in the Buu Saga, Goku still trains under Kaiosama's teachings for the tournament in Heaven. Sometimes, however, the results og Goku's impulses to turn straight to Kaiosama aren't always so great, such as when he teleported Cell to Kaio's planet when he was about to self destruct. He exploded, and Bubbles, Goku, and Kaiosama all went up in smoke. Yeah, Kaiosama wasn't too happy about that, and often complained to Goku as, with matching halos, the three of them floated past Serpent Path to relocate for Kaiosama.

In the Majin Buu saga, Kaiosama has little to do but watch from heaven as events unfold. He is, however, instrumental in the defeat of Majin Buu, when he uses his ability to communicate telepathically to help Goku and friends contact the people of Earth and get them to donate energy to the Genki Dama.

In Dragon Ball GT, he does almost nothing, because there's not much he can do when he appears so little in the show.

A major thing that I'd like to mention before closing this bio is the detestable, almost disgusting metamorphisis Kaiosama went through on his travel from Japan to America. FUNimation seriously screwed this character up. It wasn't just like Muten Roshi, where they cleaned him up - in this one, they almost completely destroyed the character. Everything you know about Kaiosama - his cheap, stupid jokes (he jokes around in the original, but most of his jokes are, you know, funny, not inane and insulting), his high, annoying voice, his bubbling snorts that rip sporadically in his laughter - just forget it. Forget it now and pretend like it never happened.

Kaiosama, truly, is a wise and elderlike leader figure. Anyone who's had the chance to hear him in Japanese knows exactly what I'm talking about, and if you don't, just hearing a few lines in his mother tongue should clue you in. He's truly intelligent, composed, and unpredictable. That's why he looks so goofy in picture - its a tribute to the way he is a contradiction, to the saying "Don't judge a book by its cover." Unfortunately, FUNimation has yet to realize this.

A wise grandfather of staggerng importance, intellectual capacity, experience, and unpredictability, Kaiosama is, more often than not, one of the few things keeping the jaws of defeat away from the Z-Senshi.

It's too bad about what FUNi's done to him...

Written by PJ, with minor additions by Dash.