IDIOT FANS, BAD FANSUBBERS, AND DBZ IN THE UNITED STATES
(REVISED: "FANSUBBERS AND IDIOT FANS: THE HELL SPAWN OF ANIME")
Written: 7 February 2000 (revised 28 June 2001)
Author: Dash

NOTE: This isn't directed at ALL fansubbers. There are some out there who actually care about the series and do their damndest to supply us with good translations. This is mostly to Anime Labs and anyone else who thinks it's "cool" to throw in random swearing for absolutely no reason. More recently, it would also be directed at digisubbers who are more concerned with being the first one to put out the episode, regardless of the quality.

SECOND NOTE: I haven't completely rewritten this editorial, so certain things are going to be outdated now. Just remember that this was originally written over a year ago.

Yes, that's right. Fansubbers and idiot fans are, in my opinion, two of the major forces holding back anime in the States. Fansubbers mar a script because they think it will look "cool," and idiot fans seem to think they represent the majority, when in reality, most of us would rather die than have their IQ, which is about the equivalent of that of a brick.

Idiot fans...what can I say? You E-mail FUNimation or other anime companies with crap like "u sux0rz ur show iz gay mayk it gud" and you expect this to change things? FUNimation is not going to release a true-to-the-original Dragon Ball Z dub in the United States because some imbecile from Michigan (not to insult people from Michigan, that's just the first place that came to mind) calls their job "gay," "retarted," or "<insert juvenile comment here>." It just doesn't work that way. Besides that, do you think anyone's going to read that trash? Why do you think E-mail programs come with delete buttons? For fun? I admit, I've been angry at FUNimation's response to E-mail in the past (or rather, lack thereof), but I cannot honestly say that I wouldn't be deleting mail by the hundreds if I were in their position. No one wants to read "ur stoopet" from some lackwit in Vermont (see Michigan comment).

Now, don't get me wrong. There is absolutely nothing wrong with sending in your opinion to someone, as long as it's a well thought-out and relevant opinion. I can't say I enjoy watching FUNimation butcher the show, but that's no reason to reduce myself to the level of a first grader and use broken English as a means of getting my point across. If you're going to write a company, do it thoughtfully.

If you've noticed, in some of the recent articles about DBZ, the most popular examples of fans of the original show are E-mails from these very people. Mindless rubes who E-mail FUNimation with "ur stoopet n amarikun dbz suxz u shud jus cel it 2 sum1 hu kan du a gud job" get their E-mail pubished because of a shortage of any better examples. I don't know about you, but I don't want to be represented by a child who couldn't be out of third grade, and who has most likely never even SEEN the Japanese Dragon Ball, but likes to say they have because it makes them "look cool" or something. If FUNimation is going to have my shared opinion from someone other than myself, it sure as hell better be well presented.

And then there are people who write out long, well-written mails that are absolutely terrible, full of horrible comments and personal attacks. Listen. FUNimation (or any other company) is made up of PEOPLE. They make mistakes. I disagree with a lot of the things they do to the dub and I consider it a mistake, but they don't deserve most of the stuff they get. If you're going to write an E-mail, fill it with CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM. People aren't exactly anxious to please people who make cruel personal attacks on them.

You've gotten fans of the Japanese Dragon Ball nothing but disdain, and perhaps some laughs from people who wonder how someone could be so stupid.

Now on to fansubbers, the hypocritical translators of many popular anime. Although I rely on fansubbers for the Japanese Dragon Ball, that does not mean I enjoy what they put out. It's the best thing available, since I know very little Japanese, but overall, I hate fansubs.

As I said above, fansubbers are hypocrites. Want an explanation? Here you go. Fansubbers' general philosophy is usually to keep the show in its original form. Obviously, there are some who are only in it for the money (Anime Labs comes to mind...), but most fansubbers I've found just want to keep the show intact. Why then, do they find it necessary to intentionally garble the translation? "Let's keep the show in its original form... oh, but throw in 'fuck' here where Vegeta speaks. It'll look cool that way." Even the truest fansubs I've found (keeping in mind that I can barely tell usually, because as you already know, I know very little Japanese) will sometimes overexaggerate swear words. Now, understand that in some shows, it can actually be appropriate to subtitle "kuso" as "shit." DBZ isn't one of those shows. About as bad as they'll ever get is "damn."

One little side note is that at NO TIME in ALL of Dragon Ball, is the phrase "Fuck you" or the word itself, "Fuck," used at all, to the best of my knowledge. Unless you're fluent in Japanese and hear the Japanese word for "fuck," never trust a subtitle that has the word in it (and I challenge you to look for it, since there IS no Japanese word for "fuck"). I've noticed that many times, the phrase will be added in at the end of a long line of dialogue. They seem to think that since someone speaks for so long, and is in such a situation, we'll just automatically stomach this extra swearing. Vegeta's arrival in movie 13 comes to mind now. God only knows what's actually said, but the subtitle on my movie 13 goes something like this: "You fucking bastard! You dare to destroy my house? FUCK YOU!!" "Bastard," maybe. "Fucking," or "FUCK YOU!!!"? Definitely not. I'm truly insulted that someone could believe I'd so blindly follow them, as if they're the god of the Japanese language. If I had the knowledge of Japanese, the means to do so, and FUNimation wasn't doing subbed DVDs, I'd be tempted to accurately fansub Dragon Ball for everyone. Thank god for Daimao and FUNimation's DVDs...

The following has been added as of June 28, 2001.
Lastly, we've got DBZ in the United States. Let's face it, people. It's time to reflect what a lot of others have already said: DBZ in the US is not going to get any better. Its best chance was with season 3. It sucked, it ended. There were rumors out there that season 4 just might be better. Guess what? It wasn't. People can bitch and bitch about the DBZ dub, but it's not going anywhere. As Chris Psaros said: Even if they do suddenly fix it for season 5, it'll be too little too late. DBZ is gone. FUNimation isn't ever going to redub it and no one else ever will, either. Go buy the DVDs FUNimation has given us, because aside from only being three episodes a disc, they're wonderful.

So what have we got left? Well, we've apparently gotten through to FUNimation finally, because Dragon Ball is using the original music, and according to reports I've heard, the translations are pretty accurate. And no one, NO ONE with an Internet connection has any right to complain about voices. Why? Because WE WERE GIVEN THE CHANCE TO CHOOSE THEM. I have to admit, I'm actually looking forward to seeing the Dragon Ball dub. Their English versions of the opening and closing themes are great and they seem to be bending over backwards to try to please the fans. Even if you dislike the dub that comes out of all this, you've gotta give them some extra points for effort.

All of these issues can really be summed up in a few words, though: It's just a TV show. No need for fans to go insane in their E-mails. No need for fansubbers to try to make it more "adult" in their translations (and, of course, succeeding only in making it more juvenile... I swear to Allah, Anime Labs must be run by a bunch of 13 year old boys). No need to get so worked up about FUNimation's dub. It's there to entertain, and my problems with the DBZ dub are all things that, in my view, are just hindrances to the entertainment factor. So let's all just step back, take a deep breath, and rethink whether some of these things we do are really worth it.